我沒有說謊 是愛情說謊
它帶你來 騙我說渴望的有可能有希望
*
there were strong feelings, no doubt about it. if not i wouldn't be compulsed to avoid you, while feeling the pain from not talking to you when i have the opportunity to. maybe you have sensed me trying to steer away from you, or maybe you haven't noticed, just like how you didn't realised until recently that i've changed my phone. i wasn't around when you were around. and when we both meet, i would probably go away after a while. because i don't want to be too near to you for such a long period of time. my mind will go overdrive, and i wouldn't be myself again.

but like what 何言風 told 陳寶茱 in 海派甜心, avoiding you is just escaping from the problem. i should face you until eventually i would find myself indifferent to what you do, and with my emotions stable and unwavering. that's when i would have really put those feelings for you behind.

i don't know what's the status of my feelings for you right now, because i can get myself to avoid you rationally, but i can't stop the tears from falling emotionally. last week was crazy cuz that's the day which i've cried the most after so long. i told myself it was hormonal imbalance, and i needed time to adjust, but i guess it's because there's a part of me still unwilling to face the truth that was told to me a few weeks ago. but then again, since i'm willing to write this for the whole world to see, i guess i'm pretty at peace with some of my inner demons. irregardless whether you are around or not, i will do things the way i want it to be, and not do stupid things like what i've done in the past.

you treat me as a friend, no doubt about it. so it lies on me entirely to put everything behind, and put my life on track again. it's getting back very soon, so just give me more time. not that you would have sensed it anyway...

goodbye.
1:59 AM